The OC Friday Morning Hangover: The Double Brown'pisode

Remember that song by Motley Crue that went "girls, girls, girls...long legs, burgandy lips?" Yeah, it was called 'Girls, Girls, Girls' and it was written about strip clubs and should have been playing when Ryan was getting a lap dance from a naughty police officer. Way to drop the ball Schwartz and hand Ryan a presumably non-alcoholic drink making him look like that creepy 50-year old guy drinking an O'Doul's at the strip club's son. I'm giving you all a fair warning here, that I'm probably going to pump out the shortest and boringest Hangover since the AFL-NFL merger to accurately reflect how boring this episode was. In fact, I'm not even hung over.

The opening scene gave away how bland of an episode this was because it was awful. I think whoever scripted this 'pisode was indeed hungover. So what happened that was signicant? Nothing. They painted a picture of the Fab 4 distancing themselves, only to have them all buttoned up by the end. Sandy's apprentice was fired than hired thanks to his lying stripper, law student friend. Aren't they all "entertaining" just to pay the college bills Sandy? To show you have ho-hum this episode was, Sandy said, "Well we've been working on our marriage for almost 25 years." Huh, that's weird, according to my season two dvds, last year you and Kirsten were married 20. I guess this year is four or five years later.

Last episode they tried killing Johny by having him get whacked by a car, now they try to throw the kid a bone by having him get doped up on vicodin and spill his soul and profess his love to "the one and only Marissa Cooper." It was vicodin, not booze, since when does it make you loose lipped and laughing, singing songs and havin' no regrets? Secondly, I only respect one individual on vicodin and he came back to win Super Bowls and MVP awards. Hey Gaddis, remember how the Packers won the Super Bowl in 1996? You should, it was a lot more recent than 1985.

So here's the other signifant parts of the episode. Seth and Summer are both applying to Brown and still very much in love. Julie and Kirsten are starting a high end dating service. Apple is doling out major money to The OC. I honestly think the best part of this episode was the commercial for King Kong. I already bought my advance tickets to the Ultra Screen because of it.

Seriously, is it Christmakuh yet?

QUESTIONS FROM THE COUCH:
1. Did Schwartz purposely plant a snoozer before the Christmakuh Barmitzmakuh'pisode?

2. Why would Chili, who idolizes Johny up and leave when his best buddy is on the PUP list?

3. Did Gaddis finish this episode or did he take a nap half way through?

4. How bored am I?

DRIVIN DOWN THE 101:
Let's see, we had a reference to Marissa's vicodin OD from season one. That was pretty cool.

IF YOU BELIEVE THEY PUT A MAN ON THE MOON...
...you can believe Sandy's business partner will fail yet again.

...Julie will screw up in her new "face" role.

...neither Seth or Summer will get into Brown.